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It’s not real racism, asserts Chen, but the kind of silly mundanity more deserving of our bemusement than our wrath.Further, thinks Chen, it’s us Asian women who stand to lose by calling this behaviour out as racist. Never has an article made me want to gnash my teeth and rip out my hair more.Apparently, we Asian American women have so saturated the dating market that we simply can’t afford to chase away the opportunity to date the “nice” Asiaphile, lest we while away the rest of our days as elderly — if morally superior — spinsters.Moreover, is this really a thought that crosses a decent gentleman’s mind while he debates asking the cute girl out? But, I can't ask her out for coffee because if I do, she'll think I've internalized Orientalist and misogynistic stereotypes of Asian women as part of a long-standing fetish I have for the Eastern arts and culture, and that my interest in her is part of an elaborate ploy to engage in kinky recreations of Western colonialism of the Asian continent and its people using my recently purchased "Naughty Geisha" Halloween costume and discount foot-binding kit.

Writes Chen: the dating prospects of Asian females and non-Asian males alike.By promoting the “creepy [white] man with Asian fetish” stereotype in public discourse, we Asian women are shooting ourselves in the foot.We subtly reinforce that the predominant narrative of interracial dating between non-Asian men and Asian women is one of patriarchal, racist power structures, when we know that is not always the case.There is a world of difference between the old, ignorant fetishist and the average guy I’ve met who dates Asian women.Chen paints an elaborate portrait of the meager dating options for single Asian women today (one that certainly makes me relieved that this isn’t something I have to worry about).

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She asserts that there are two — and apparently only two — different kinds of non-Asian guys available for Asian women to date: 1) White guys who exclusively date Asian girls and who are fetishistic assholes, and 2) White guys who exclusively date Asian girls… Or: I admit, I was up until this point, completely unaware that the past few years’ Recession had also hit the dating economy so hard.

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